MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
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Corporate Dossier
Ultracapitalism / Company Archives Bankruptcy Filed
Baron, company founder
Founded by Baron

Shoestring Systems

10 Years in business
Filed September 15, 2026 at 09:59 UTC

Financial Summary

Final Valuation
$1,105
Final Liquid Funding
$2,407
Fiscal Review Record
7 Wins / 3 Setbacks

Asset Portfolio

▼ 160
Consultant
Pivoted
Pivoted

Consultant

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 160 Loss.
Buzzword
Pivoted
Pivoted
▸ +15% Windfall chance.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Windfall
Chance for an asset to inflict double Loss, Profit, Revenue, Moat, Debt, and Scandal when it acts.
◆ 60 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 15
Busy Receptionist
Disruptive
Disruptive

Busy Receptionist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
4.0
SEC
▸ Gain 15 Moat.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 13 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 50 ▲ 70
Bankruptcy Lawyer
Gamified
Gamified

Bankruptcy Lawyer

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 50 Moat.
▸ The first time your Cash falls below half: remove 100% of your Debt and Profit 70.
Buzzword
Gamified
Gamified
▸ +25% Windfall chance.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Windfall
Chance for an asset to inflict double Loss, Profit, Revenue, Moat, Debt, and Scandal when it acts.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 40 ▼ 40
Loan Shark
Offshore
Offshore

Loan Shark

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 40.
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Offshore
Offshore
▸ +10 Loss.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 25
Watchdog

Watchdog

BASIC
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 25 Moat.
▸ Audit a rival Scheme 5s.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
#5
Compliance Officer
Patented
Patented

Compliance Officer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
8.0
SEC
▸ Apply 2 Debt.
▸ Slow the rival's fastest asset 3s.
Buzzword
Patented
Patented
▸ At the start of battle, gain 15 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 80
In-House Counsel
Unionized
Unionized

In-House Counsel

PLUS
MEDIUM HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Gain 80 Moat.
▸ When one of your Employees would be Audited, this is Audited instead.
Buzzword
Unionized
Unionized
▸ At the start of battle, Profit 10.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.
◆ 55 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 40
Project Manager
Leveraged
Leveraged

Project Manager

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
8.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 2s.
Buzzword
Leveraged
Leveraged
▸ +25% Loss, and also apply 1 Debt to yourself.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
#9
Copywriter
Agile
✦ MVP ✦
Agile

Copywriter

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 11 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +4 Scandal.
Buzzword
Agile
Agile
▸ 10% faster.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 96 Funding
Full Dossier →

Corporate Policies

Aggressive Expansion
◆
#1

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Recurring Revenue
ENTERPRISE
◆
#2

Recurring Revenue

POLICY ENTERPRISE
▸ Permanently gain +8 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 880 Funding
Aggressive Pricing
◆
#3

Aggressive Pricing

POLICY
▸ Market Share 2%: a percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Share
A percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 60 Funding
Regulatory Capture
◆
#4

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
Lean Operations
◆
#5

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Fortified
◆
#6

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding
Open Door Policy
PLUS
◆
#7

Open Door Policy

POLICY PLUS
▸ When one of your Employees is Slowed, Fast Track it 3s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Quality Assurance
◆
#8

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding

Fiscal Growth Timeline

INSOLVENCY FILED
Cumulative Wins
Cumulative Losses
Bankruptcy Limit (3)
Conceded 3 fatal setbacks by Fiscal Year 10, triggering mandatory corporate bankruptcy.
FINAL OUTCOME • FISCAL YEAR 10 • $1,105 VALUATION • 7 Wins / 3 Setbacks
0 Baseline 2 ▲ 3 BANKRUPTCY 4 6 ★ 8 DOMINATION Yr 1 $200 Fiscal Year 1: 0 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $200 Valuation Yr 2 $275 Fiscal Year 2: 1 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $275 Valuation Yr 3 $430 Fiscal Year 3: 2 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $430 Valuation Yr 4 $525 Fiscal Year 4: 3 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $525 Valuation Yr 5 $635 Fiscal Year 5: 3 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $635 Valuation Yr 6 $730 Fiscal Year 6: 4 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $730 Valuation Yr 7 $825 Fiscal Year 7: 5 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $825 Valuation Yr 8 $930 Fiscal Year 8: 6 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $930 Valuation Yr 9 $1,005 Fiscal Year 9: 7 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $1,005 Valuation Yr 10 $1,105 Fiscal Year 10: 7 Wins, 3 Setbacks, $1,105 Valuation
Audit Raw Fiscal Records (Tabular Breakdown)
Fiscal Year Closing Valuation Cumulative Wins Cumulative Setbacks Status
Year 1 $200 0 1 Setback
Year 2 $275 1 1 Stable
Year 3 $430 2 1 Stable
Year 4 $525 3 1 Stable
Year 5 $635 3 2 1 Strike Left
Year 6 $730 4 2 1 Strike Left
Year 7 $825 5 2 1 Strike Left
Year 8 $930 6 2 1 Strike Left
Year 9 $1,005 7 2 1 Strike Left
Year 10 $1,105 7 3 Bankrupt

Quarterly Shareholder Report →

Ongoing Boardroom Performance

At each year-end, an audit snapshot of Shoestring Systems is filed to challenge rival corporate executives during their End-of-Year Showdowns.

Showdown Record
0W / 0L
0 battles logged to date
Board Win Rate
—
Awaiting first showdown
Active Board Snapshots
0 Filings
Archived record

Exhibit / Corporate Fingerprint

Company DNA

Composition of the final board

4 types
One corporate identity
  • Human ×7
    Human / 7 assets
    • Consultant
    • Busy Receptionist
    • Bankruptcy Lawyer
    • Compliance Officer
    • In-House Counsel
    • Project Manager
    • Copywriter
  • Employee ×6
    Employee / 6 assets
    • Consultant
    • Busy Receptionist
    • Compliance Officer
    • In-House Counsel
    • Project Manager
    • Copywriter
  • Service ×5
    Service / 5 assets
    • Consultant
    • Bankruptcy Lawyer
    • Loan Shark
    • Watchdog
    • In-House Counsel
  • Animal ×2
    Animal / 2 assets
    • Loan Shark
    • Watchdog
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