MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
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Baron

QUARTERLY SHAREHOLDER REPORT · 2026-Q4

Ramen Ventures

Baron, Old Money · Final year 7 · Bankruptcy

Bankrupt · History retained

ALL ANNUAL BOARDS THIS QUARTER0W / 0L
DOMINANCE—
YEAR 7 PLACEMENT—

Final board

◈ 16
Chief Storyteller

Chief Storyteller

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +18 Valuation.
▸ Gain 16 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
#1
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
#2
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
#3
Copywriter
Agile
✦ MVP ✦
Agile

Copywriter

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 11 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +4 Scandal.
Buzzword
Agile
Agile
▸ 10% faster.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 96 Funding
Full Dossier →
#4
Keynote Speaker

Keynote Speaker

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +10 Valuation.
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 1s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 120
Payday Loan
Disruptive
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 40 ▲ 40
Hard Worker
Litigious
Litigious

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 120
Marketing Strategist

Marketing Strategist

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 120 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +80 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 120 Funding
Full Dossier →
#8
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 5 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 160 ◈ 160
Snail Mail

Snail Mail

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
15.0
SEC
▸ Profit 160.
▸ Gain 160 Moat.
▸ Remove 8 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 60 Funding
Full Dossier →

Enacted corporate policies

Lean Operations
◆
#1

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion
◆
#2

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture
◆
#3

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
Old Money Rules
◆
#4

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Grassroots Growth
◆
#5

Grassroots Growth

POLICY
▸ After a won battle, permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 55 Funding
Fortified
◆
#6

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding
Austerity Measures
◆
#7

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
POLICY SLOT
#8

Recent player encounters

Awaiting the first tracked showdown this quarter.

Score breakdown

Starting run record: 4W / 3L. Eligible final-board results: 0. Distinct opponents: 0.

Excluded repeated encounters: 0. Rating uncertainty: Not enough evidence. Your run's record sets the starting rating, and battles against same-year boards update it.

Annual Boardroom Snapshots

Historical portfolio audits captured at the conclusion of each fiscal year.

7 Years Archived
YEAR 1 $170 0W - 0S
Assets
Consultant
+

Consultant

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 80 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Advisor

Advisor

BASIC
MEDIUM HUMAN EMPLOYEE
6.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track adjacent assets 2s.
▸ Profit 30.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 22 Funding
Full Dossier →
Chief Storyteller

Chief Storyteller

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +10 Valuation.
▸ Gain 8 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
YEAR 2 $295 1W - 0S
Assets
Consultant
+

Consultant

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 80 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 5 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter

Copywriter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +1 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
+

Copywriter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 6 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +2 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 24 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
YEAR 3 $355 2W - 0S
Assets
Consultant
+

Consultant

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 80 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 5 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
+

Copywriter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 6 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +2 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 24 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+
⚡
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Marketing Strategist

Marketing Strategist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 15 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +10 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter

Copywriter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +1 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
YEAR 4 $355 3W - 0S
Assets
Loan Shark
+

Loan Shark

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 40.
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter
+

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
+

Copywriter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 6 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +2 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 24 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+
⚡
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++
⚡
Litigious

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Marketing Strategist

Marketing Strategist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 15 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +10 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter

Copywriter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +1 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
YEAR 5 $448 4W - 0S
Assets
Loan Shark
+

Loan Shark

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 40.
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter
+

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
++

Copywriter

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 8 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +3 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 48 Funding
Full Dossier →
Keynote Speaker

Keynote Speaker

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +10 Valuation.
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 1s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+
⚡
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++
⚡
Litigious

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Marketing Strategist
+

Marketing Strategist

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 30 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Data Scientist
+

Data Scientist

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track your fastest asset 1.5s.
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 22 Funding
Full Dossier →
Chief Storyteller
+

Chief Storyteller

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +18 Valuation.
▸ Gain 16 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
Old Money Rules

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Grassroots Growth

Grassroots Growth

POLICY
▸ After a won battle, permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 55 Funding
YEAR 6 $621 4W - 1S
Assets
Loan Shark
+

Loan Shark

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 40.
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter
+

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
+++

Copywriter

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 11 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +4 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 96 Funding
Full Dossier →
Keynote Speaker

Keynote Speaker

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +10 Valuation.
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 1s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+
⚡
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++
⚡
Litigious

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Marketing Strategist
++

Marketing Strategist

PRO
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 60 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +40 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 60 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 5 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Chief Storyteller
+

Chief Storyteller

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +18 Valuation.
▸ Gain 16 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
Old Money Rules

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Grassroots Growth

Grassroots Growth

POLICY
▸ After a won battle, permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 55 Funding
Fortified

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding
Austerity Measures

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
YEAR 7 $705 4W - 2S
Assets
Chief Storyteller
+

Chief Storyteller

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +18 Valuation.
▸ Gain 16 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter
+

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
Lobbyist

Lobbyist

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 3 Debt.
▸ Apply 4 Scandal.
Keywords
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Copywriter
+++
⚡
Agile

Copywriter

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Apply 11 Scandal.
▸ Your other assets apply +4 Scandal.
Buzzword
Agile
Agile
▸ 10% faster.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 96 Funding
Full Dossier →
Keynote Speaker

Keynote Speaker

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
10.0
SEC
▸ Permanently gain +10 Valuation.
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 1s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
Payday Loan
+
⚡
Disruptive

Payday Loan

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Buzzword
Disruptive
Disruptive
▸ Also apply 2 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
++
⚡
Litigious

Hard Worker

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 40.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Marketing Strategist
+++

Marketing Strategist

ENTERPRISE
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 120 Moat.
▸ When you apply Scandal, this gains +80 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 120 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 5 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 17 Funding
Full Dossier →
Snail Mail
+

Snail Mail

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
15.0
SEC
▸ Profit 160.
▸ Gain 160 Moat.
▸ Remove 8 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 60 Funding
Full Dossier →
Policies
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Aggressive Expansion

Aggressive Expansion

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +50 Valuation.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 30 Funding
Regulatory Capture

Regulatory Capture

POLICY
▸ When you apply Scandal, gain 6 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 75 Funding
Old Money Rules

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Grassroots Growth

Grassroots Growth

POLICY
▸ After a won battle, permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 55 Funding
Fortified

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding
Austerity Measures

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding