MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
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Baron

QUARTERLY SHAREHOLDER REPORT · 2026-Q4

Cold Outreach Capital

Baron, Old Money · Final year 3 · Bankruptcy

Bankrupt · History retained

ALL ANNUAL BOARDS THIS QUARTER0W / 0L
DOMINANCE—
YEAR 3 PLACEMENT—

Final board

▼ 40
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 40
Freelancer

Freelancer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 24 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 20 ▲ 20
Hard Worker

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Permanent Modifications
Permanent fiscal enhancements active on this asset.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 120
Unpaid Intern
✦ MVP ✦

Unpaid Intern

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 10
Nepo Baby

Nepo Baby

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN
3.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Human 0.1s.
▸ Profit 10.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
#5
Paid Reporter

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 15
Scrum Master

Scrum Master

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track adjacent Employees 1s.
▸ Profit 15.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 15
Sales Training

Sales Training

BASIC
SMALL BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 15 Loss.
▸ At the start of each battle, a random Employee of yours permanently gains +3 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 10 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ #8
◈ #9

Enacted corporate policies

Recurring Revenue
◆
#1

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Lean Operations
◆
#2

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
POLICY SLOT
#3
POLICY SLOT
#4
POLICY SLOT
#5
POLICY SLOT
#6
POLICY SLOT
#7
POLICY SLOT
#8

Recent player encounters

Awaiting the first tracked showdown this quarter.

Score breakdown

Starting run record: 0W / 3L. Eligible final-board results: 0. Distinct opponents: 0.

Excluded repeated encounters: 0. Rating uncertainty: Not enough evidence. Your run's record sets the starting rating, and battles against same-year boards update it.

Annual Boardroom Snapshots

Historical portfolio audits captured at the conclusion of each fiscal year.

3 Years Archived
YEAR 1 $170 0W - 0S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Freelancer

Freelancer

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
Unpaid Intern

Unpaid Intern

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 30.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
◆ 7 Funding
Full Dossier →
Loan Shark

Loan Shark

BASIC
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 13 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
YEAR 2 $230 0W - 1S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Freelancer

Freelancer

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Cubicle Farm

Cubicle Farm

BASIC
MEDIUM PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 1 Revenue.
▸ When one of your Employees activates, Profit 10.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
◆ 5 Funding
Full Dossier →
Unpaid Intern
+

Unpaid Intern

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 60.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
YEAR 3 $290 0W - 2S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Freelancer
+

Freelancer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 24 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Permanent Modifications
Permanent fiscal enhancements active on this asset.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Unpaid Intern
++

Unpaid Intern

PRO
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 120.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
◆ 28 Funding
Full Dossier →
Nepo Baby

Nepo Baby

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN
3.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Human 0.1s.
▸ Profit 10.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
Paid Reporter
+

Paid Reporter

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Apply 7 Scandal.
Keywords
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
Scrum Master

Scrum Master

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
9.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track adjacent Employees 1s.
▸ Profit 15.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to an Employee.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
Sales Training

Sales Training

BASIC
SMALL BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 15 Loss.
▸ At the start of each battle, a random Employee of yours permanently gains +3 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 10 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding