MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
◀ Endowments & Grants Directory / event.gift.curbside_haul
STATUS: RATIFIED DISBURSEMENT
UC
SEC FORM 8-K · STATUTORY CAPITAL DISBURSEMENT
REF #88410B80
The Curbside Desk Haul
GRANT · TAKE WHAT'S OFFERED

The Curbside Desk Haul

The crypto firm two doors down abandoned their standing desks on the curb at dawn, along with an unmonitored petty cash tin.

COLLECT OFFER ◈
RATIFIED TREASURY ENDORSEMENT
CORPORATE TREASURY DISBURSED DISBURSED IN FULL ◈ FISCAL YEAR AUDITED
BOARDROOM INCIDENT RECORD HISTORICAL PROSE
“The crypto firm two doors down abandoned their standing desks on the curb at dawn, along with an unmonitored petty cash tin.”

Statutory Filing Specifications

Form 8-K Regulatory Docket

Distribution limitations and encounter parameters governing this corporate windfall:

Filing Identifier event.gift.curbside_haul Canonical Asset ID
Disbursement Era Founding Year Exclusive (Year 1) Early Scalability Window
Encounter Weight 75 / 100 High Distribution Probability
Run Limitation 1 appearance max per run Non-repeatable Windfall
ART DIRECTION ARCHIVE SPECIFICATION:

“three mesh ergonomic task chairs piled in the back of a hatchback”

Statutory Disbursement Terms & Benefits

2 Covenants

Immediate capital allocations delivered upon signing the grant resolution:

📦
Asset Allocation
Free Property Asset to Reserves
Target Roster Category: Property
💰
Funding Allocation
+10◈ Direct Funding Injection

Eligible Asset Pool Available for Disbursement

35 Assets

When accepted, one of the following unencumbered units is delivered to corporate reserves:

Apartment Upstairs
Uncommon Medium

Apartment Upstairs

$16 Utility
Back Room
Uncommon Medium

Back Room

$14 +6.7 P/s
Black Turtleneck
Uncommon Small

Black Turtleneck

$60 Utility
Comfy Chair
Common Small

Comfy Chair

$8 +5.0 M/s
Community Board
Uncommon Medium

Community Board

$14 +1.0 M/s
Cubicle Farm
Uncommon Medium

Cubicle Farm

$16 +1.3 P/s
Daddy's Company
Rare Large

Daddy's Company

$28 +50.0 P/s
Data Warehouse
Rare Large

Data Warehouse

$28 +2.8 P/s
Dog-Friendly Office
Uncommon Medium

Dog-Friendly Office

$80 +10.0 P/s
Family Office
Uncommon Medium

Family Office

$20 +7.1 P/s
Fundraising Gala
Rare Large

Fundraising Gala

$25 +3.3 P/s
Generational Wealth
Rare Large

Generational Wealth

$28 +6.7 P/s

Executive Acceptance Telemetry

Version Current Filings
Pick Rate
30.2% (51 / 169 Offered)

Percentage of game quarters where the executive team chose to claim this grant instead of rival options.

Offered / Seen 169
Accepted / Claimed 51
Declined / Passed 118
VERSION 1.0.0 BENCHMARK +4.4% vs Median

Above Median Conversion. Regularly capitalized by corporate founders during early-stage scaling. Across all 39 grants in this build, median acceptance is 25.8%.

Recent Corporate Filings

6 Recent Filings
DEFEAT
CEO Sergei • Year 4 • Bankruptcy
$365 Valuation
about 5 hours ago
DEFEAT
CEO Sergei • Year 4 • Bankruptcy
$275 Valuation
3 days ago
DEFEAT
CEO Baron • Year 4 • Bankruptcy
$380 Valuation
3 days ago
DEFEAT
CEO Baron • Year 9 • Bankruptcy
$900 Valuation
3 days ago
DEFEAT
CEO Baron • Year 8 • Bankruptcy
$800 Valuation
3 days ago
DEFEAT
CEO Sergei • Year 4 • Bankruptcy
$285 Valuation
4 days ago