MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
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Corporate Dossier
Ultracapitalism / Company Archives Bankruptcy Filed
Sergei, company founder
Founded by Sergei

Ultimate Acquisitions

4 Years in business
Filed September 15, 2026 at 03:06 UTC

Financial Summary

Final Valuation
$295
Final Liquid Funding
$199
Fiscal Review Record
1 Wins / 3 Setbacks

Asset Portfolio

#0
Rubber Duck

Rubber Duck

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
4.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 2s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 20 ▲ 20
10X Coder
✦ MVP ✦

10X Coder

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Scale 2.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 40
Graphic Designer

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 30
Busy Receptionist

Busy Receptionist

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
4.0
SEC
▸ Gain 30 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 20 ▲ 20
Hard Worker

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 100 ▼ 100
Temp Worker

Temp Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 100.
▸ Inflict 100 Loss.
▸ Liquidate this.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 40 ▲ 40
Vulture Capitalist

Vulture Capitalist

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Apply 2 Debt.
▸ When an asset is Liquidated, Fast Track this 3s and Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 22 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 32
Fire Sale

Fire Sale

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 32 Loss.
▸ When the Market Crash begins, inflict 100 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Crash
After 30 seconds, everyone loses money — fast, and it gets worse.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ #8
◈ #9

Corporate Policies

Austerity Measures
◆
#1

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
Quality Assurance
◆
#2

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
POLICY SLOT
#3
POLICY SLOT
#4
POLICY SLOT
#5
POLICY SLOT
#6
POLICY SLOT
#7
POLICY SLOT
#8

Fiscal Growth Timeline

INSOLVENCY FILED
Cumulative Wins
Cumulative Losses
Bankruptcy Limit (3)
Conceded 3 fatal setbacks by Fiscal Year 4, triggering mandatory corporate bankruptcy.
FINAL OUTCOME • FISCAL YEAR 4 • $295 VALUATION • 1 Wins / 3 Setbacks
0 Baseline 2 ▲ 3 BANKRUPTCY 4 6 ★ 8 DOMINATION Yr 1 $120 Fiscal Year 1: 1 Wins, 0 Setbacks, $120 Valuation Yr 2 $170 Fiscal Year 2: 1 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $170 Valuation Yr 3 $230 Fiscal Year 3: 1 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $230 Valuation Yr 4 $295 Fiscal Year 4: 1 Wins, 3 Setbacks, $295 Valuation
Audit Raw Fiscal Records (Tabular Breakdown)
Fiscal Year Closing Valuation Cumulative Wins Cumulative Setbacks Status
Year 1 $120 1 0 Stable
Year 2 $170 1 1 Setback
Year 3 $230 1 2 1 Strike Left
Year 4 $295 1 3 Bankrupt

Quarterly Shareholder Report →

Ongoing Boardroom Performance

At each year-end, an audit snapshot of Ultimate Acquisitions is filed to challenge rival corporate executives during their End-of-Year Showdowns.

Showdown Record
0W / 1L
1 battle fought as rival board
Board Win Rate
0.0%
0 rivals repelled
Active Board Snapshots
4 Filings
Years 1 through 4

Annual Boardroom Snapshots

Historical portfolio audits captured at the conclusion of each fiscal year.

4 Years Archived
YEAR 1 $120 0W - 0S
Assets
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Code Monkey
+

Code Monkey

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL EMPLOYEE
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 10.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to a Machine.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Robot Worker

Robot Worker

BASIC
SMALL MACHINE EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 12 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
YEAR 2 $170 1W - 0S
Assets
Rubber Duck
+

Rubber Duck

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
4.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 2s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
10X Coder
+

10X Coder

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Scale 2.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Code Monkey
+

Code Monkey

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL EMPLOYEE
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Profit 10.
▸ Scale +1 while adjacent to a Machine.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Robot Worker

Robot Worker

BASIC
SMALL MACHINE EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 12 Loss.
▸ Gain 1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 8 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
Policies
Austerity Measures

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
YEAR 3 $230 1W - 1S
Assets
Rubber Duck
+

Rubber Duck

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
4.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 2s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
10X Coder
+

10X Coder

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Scale 2.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Vulture Capitalist
+

Vulture Capitalist

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Apply 2 Debt.
▸ When an asset is Liquidated, Fast Track this 3s and Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 22 Funding
Full Dossier →
Temp Worker
+

Temp Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 100.
▸ Inflict 100 Loss.
▸ Liquidate this.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Skeleton Crew
+

Skeleton Crew

PLUS
MEDIUM HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Gain 20 Moat.
▸ Apply 1 Debt.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 35 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Austerity Measures

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
Quality Assurance

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
YEAR 4 $230 1W - 2S
Assets
Rubber Duck
+

Rubber Duck

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
4.0
SEC
▸ Fast Track an adjacent Employee 2s.
Keywords
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
◆ 6 Funding
Full Dossier →
10X Coder
+

10X Coder

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
▸ Scale 2.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Busy Receptionist
+

Busy Receptionist

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
4.0
SEC
▸ Gain 30 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Hard Worker
+

Hard Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 14 Funding
Full Dossier →
Temp Worker
+

Temp Worker

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Profit 100.
▸ Inflict 100 Loss.
▸ Liquidate this.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Vulture Capitalist
+

Vulture Capitalist

PLUS
SMALL ANIMAL
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
▸ Apply 2 Debt.
▸ When an asset is Liquidated, Fast Track this 3s and Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Fast Track
Instantly advances an asset's progress toward acting.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 22 Funding
Full Dossier →
Fire Sale
+

Fire Sale

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
6.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 32 Loss.
▸ When the Market Crash begins, inflict 100 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Crash
After 30 seconds, everyone loses money — fast, and it gets worse.
◆ 16 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Austerity Measures

Austerity Measures

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
▸ Your assets Profit 5 less.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 37 Funding
Quality Assurance

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding

Exhibit / Corporate Fingerprint

Company DNA

Composition of the final board

5 types
One corporate identity
  • Employee ×5
    Employee / 5 assets
    • 10X Coder
    • Graphic Designer
    • Busy Receptionist
    • Hard Worker
    • Temp Worker
  • Human ×5
    Human / 5 assets
    • 10X Coder
    • Graphic Designer
    • Busy Receptionist
    • Hard Worker
    • Temp Worker
  • Animal ×2
    Animal / 2 assets
    • Rubber Duck
    • Vulture Capitalist
  • Scheme ×1
    Scheme / 1 asset
    • Fire Sale
  • Service ×1
    Service / 1 asset
    • Rubber Duck
Larger type · Greater presenceInspect a type to reveal its assets ↗