MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
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Corporate Dossier
Ultracapitalism / Company Archives Bankruptcy Filed
Baron, company founder
Founded by Baron

The Side Hustle Group

4 Years in business
Filed September 28, 2026 at 13:33 UTC

Financial Summary

Final Valuation
$325
Final Liquid Funding
$430
Fiscal Review Record
1 Wins / 3 Setbacks

Asset Portfolio

▼ 40
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
⇈ 2
Interest Check

Interest Check

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 2 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
◆ 4 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈ 40
Graphic Designer
Litigious
Litigious

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 80
Offshore Account

Offshore Account

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Scale +1 while you have more Cash than the rival.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 80
Expense Account
✦ MVP ✦

Expense Account

PLUS
MEDIUM BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Whenever you gain Debt, Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 18 Funding
Full Dossier →
▲ 30
Crunch Time

Crunch Time

BASIC
MEDIUM SCHEME
10.0
SEC
▸ Overwork your Employees 3s.
▸ Profit 30.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Overwork
The asset works twice as fast while Overworked.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
▼ 20 ◈ 20
Focus Group

Focus Group

BASIC
MEDIUM SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Gain 20 Moat.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 20 Funding
Full Dossier →

Corporate Policies

Recurring Revenue
◆
#1

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Quality Assurance
◆
#2

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
Aggressive Pricing
◆
#3

Aggressive Pricing

POLICY
▸ Market Share 2%: a percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Share
A percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 60 Funding
Lean Operations
◆
#4

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Old Money Rules
◆
#5

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Fortified
◆
#6

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding
POLICY SLOT
#7
POLICY SLOT
#8

Fiscal Growth Timeline

INSOLVENCY FILED
Cumulative Wins
Cumulative Losses
Bankruptcy Limit (3)
Conceded 3 fatal setbacks by Fiscal Year 4, triggering mandatory corporate bankruptcy.
FINAL OUTCOME • FISCAL YEAR 4 • $325 VALUATION • 1 Wins / 3 Setbacks
0 Baseline 2 ▲ 3 BANKRUPTCY 4 6 ★ 8 DOMINATION Yr 1 $160 Fiscal Year 1: 1 Wins, 0 Setbacks, $160 Valuation Yr 2 $200 Fiscal Year 2: 1 Wins, 1 Setbacks, $200 Valuation Yr 3 $260 Fiscal Year 3: 1 Wins, 2 Setbacks, $260 Valuation Yr 4 $325 Fiscal Year 4: 1 Wins, 3 Setbacks, $325 Valuation
Audit Raw Fiscal Records (Tabular Breakdown)
Fiscal Year Closing Valuation Cumulative Wins Cumulative Setbacks Status
Year 1 $160 1 0 Stable
Year 2 $200 1 1 Setback
Year 3 $260 1 2 1 Strike Left
Year 4 $325 1 3 Bankrupt

Quarterly Shareholder Report →

Ongoing Boardroom Performance

At each year-end, an audit snapshot of The Side Hustle Group is filed to challenge rival corporate executives during their End-of-Year Showdowns.

Showdown Record
0W / 0L
0 battles logged to date
Board Win Rate
—
Awaiting first showdown
Active Board Snapshots
4 Filings
Years 1 through 4

Annual Boardroom Snapshots

Historical portfolio audits captured at the conclusion of each fiscal year.

4 Years Archived
YEAR 1 $160 0W - 0S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Interest Check

Interest Check

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 2 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
◆ 4 Funding
Full Dossier →
Security Guard

Security Guard

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
▸ Gain 12 Moat.
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 30 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
◆ 10 Funding
Full Dossier →
Offshore Account
+

Offshore Account

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Scale +1 while you have more Cash than the rival.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
◈
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
YEAR 2 $200 1W - 0S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Interest Check

Interest Check

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 2 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
◆ 4 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Offshore Account
+

Offshore Account

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Scale +1 while you have more Cash than the rival.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Expense Account

Expense Account

BASIC
MEDIUM BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 40.
▸ Whenever you gain Debt, Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 9 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
◈
◈
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Quality Assurance

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
Aggressive Pricing

Aggressive Pricing

POLICY
▸ Market Share 2%: a percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Share
A percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 60 Funding
YEAR 3 $260 1W - 1S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Interest Check

Interest Check

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 2 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
◆ 4 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Offshore Account
+

Offshore Account

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Scale +1 while you have more Cash than the rival.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Expense Account
+

Expense Account

PLUS
MEDIUM BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Whenever you gain Debt, Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 18 Funding
Full Dossier →
Crunch Time

Crunch Time

BASIC
MEDIUM SCHEME
10.0
SEC
▸ Overwork your Employees 3s.
▸ Profit 30.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Overwork
The asset works twice as fast while Overworked.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
◈
◈
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Quality Assurance

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
Aggressive Pricing

Aggressive Pricing

POLICY
▸ Market Share 2%: a percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Share
A percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 60 Funding
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Old Money Rules

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
YEAR 4 $325 1W - 2S
Assets
Consultant

Consultant

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE SERVICE
5.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 40 Loss.
Keywords
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
◆ 15 Funding
Full Dossier →
Interest Check

Interest Check

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY
8.0
SEC
▸ Gain 2 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
◆ 4 Funding
Full Dossier →
Graphic Designer
+
⚡
Litigious

Graphic Designer

PLUS
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
7.0
SEC
▸ Gain 40 Moat.
▸ When you use an adjacent Employee, gain 20 Moat.
Buzzword
Litigious
Litigious
▸ Also apply 1 Scandal.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
◆ 30 Funding
Full Dossier →
Offshore Account
+

Offshore Account

PLUS
SMALL SCHEME
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Scale +1 while you have more Cash than the rival.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Scale
The asset's effects trigger additional times each time it acts.
◆ 26 Funding
Full Dossier →
Expense Account
+

Expense Account

PLUS
MEDIUM BENEFIT
8.0
SEC
▸ Profit 80.
▸ Whenever you gain Debt, Profit 40.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
◆ 18 Funding
Full Dossier →
Crunch Time

Crunch Time

BASIC
MEDIUM SCHEME
10.0
SEC
▸ Overwork your Employees 3s.
▸ Profit 30.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Overwork
The asset works twice as fast while Overworked.
◆ 12 Funding
Full Dossier →
Focus Group

Focus Group

BASIC
MEDIUM SERVICE
7.0
SEC
▸ Inflict 20 Loss.
▸ Gain 20 Moat.
▸ Profit 20.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
◆ 20 Funding
Full Dossier →
Policies
Recurring Revenue

Recurring Revenue

POLICY
▸ Permanently gain +1 Revenue.
Keywords
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 110 Funding
Quality Assurance

Quality Assurance

POLICY
▸ When one of your assets is Liquidated, gain 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Liquidate
Removed for the rest of the battle.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 90 Funding
Aggressive Pricing

Aggressive Pricing

POLICY
▸ Market Share 2%: a percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Keywords
Profit
Restores your Cash, up to your Valuation.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Market Share
A percentage of Loss dealt to rival Cash returns as Profit.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 60 Funding
Lean Operations

Lean Operations

POLICY
▸ Your assets act 0.1s faster.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 50 Funding
Old Money Rules

Old Money Rules

POLICY
▸ Start each battle with 100 Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 180 Funding
Fortified

Fortified

POLICY
▸ Your assets grant 6% more Moat.
Keywords
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Inspect Directive Dossier →
◆ 65 Funding

Exhibit / Corporate Fingerprint

Company DNA

Composition of the final board

6 types
One corporate identity
  • Employee ×2
    Employee / 2 assets
    • Consultant
    • Graphic Designer
  • Human ×2
    Human / 2 assets
    • Consultant
    • Graphic Designer
  • Scheme ×2
    Scheme / 2 assets
    • Offshore Account
    • Crunch Time
  • Service ×2
    Service / 2 assets
    • Consultant
    • Focus Group
  • Benefit ×1
    Benefit / 1 asset
    • Expense Account
  • Property ×1
    Property / 1 asset
    • Interest Check
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